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Rhetorical Questions

These questions aren't expected to be answered. Fill in the blanks.
Strictly speaking, many of these are not true rhetorical questions
Quiz by Quizmaster
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First submittedSeptember 4, 2013
Last updatedSeptember 4, 2013
Times taken37,734
Rating3.39
4:00
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Question
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
If you prick us, do we not bleed?
Is the pope Catholic?
If a tree falls in the forest, does it make a sound?
Am I my brother's keeper?
How you like them apples?
Is the sky blue?
How now, brown cow?
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
How many roads must a man walk down
before you call him a man?
Question
What would Jesus do?
Et tu, Brute?
Who let the dogs out?
They shoot horses, don't they?
Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Can a leopard change its spots?
How high the moon?
Oh yeah? You and what army?
Can God create a rock so heavy
that even he cannot lift it?
+5
level 73
Oct 14, 2013
Who wants to be a millionaire?
+8
level 14
Aug 2, 2015
me
+1
level 16
Dec 20, 2016
hello rhetorical
+2
level 33
Sep 17, 2017
Another rhetorical question. How long is a piece of string?
+7
level 51
Nov 17, 2017
|------------------------------------| This long.
+12
level 73
Feb 1, 2018
twice as long as half its length
+4
level 50
Oct 26, 2013
I'm sure that there are others that are thinking the same question, but I'll go ahead and be the first to say it: "What does the fox say?"
+1
level 77
Oct 29, 2013
Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding
+1
level 25
Oct 31, 2013
Die. I swear if I see that one more time...
+1
level 15
Nov 13, 2013
I second that! :P
+1
level 80
Aug 21, 2014
Better to see than hear!
+2
level 14
Jun 13, 2015
I'm just glad it isn't popular anymore. Besides, I've seen quite a few foxes, and do you know what noise they make? Let me show you: "..."
+2
level 49
Aug 9, 2016
I know it's a bit late, but I have a quiz for that.
+1
level 49
Aug 9, 2016
http://www.jetpunk.com/user-quizzes/144821/what-does-the-fox-say
+2
level 60
Jun 18, 2018
help me
+1
level 48
Aug 9, 2016
hahaha
+1
level 70
Mar 7, 2017
I don't get it. And I think I don't care that I don't get it.
+2
level 48
Mar 14, 2017
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIR8RtI9kaw
+1
level 80
Oct 26, 2013
Are you not entertained?
+1
level 78
Oct 26, 2013
Who ate all the .....? (pies)
+2
level 53
Aug 9, 2016
Wiganers...
+1
level 58
Aug 9, 2016
Cookies.
+1
level 66
Oct 26, 2013
Who do you think you are, running round leaving scars, collecting your jar of hearts, tearing love apart; you're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your sole; don't come back for me; who do you think you are?
+1
level 15
Nov 13, 2013
Voldemort...
+1
level 36
May 24, 2016
Lol
+3
level 46
Feb 8, 2016
The ice inside your sole? You must have cold feet.
+2
level 21
Oct 26, 2013
You should add, "Are you asleep?"
+1
level 46
Jun 18, 2018
Are you dead?
+2
level 77
Oct 26, 2013
Got all of these except for "how high,"... don't think I've heard that one before. and I know there's the caveat at the top and that it doesn't really matter, but.. some of these in addition to not being truly rhetorical questions are also not questions that are not meant to be answered... like... "what would Jesus do?" I think most of the time when people ask that they really are expecting you to think about the answer, if not vocalize it.
+3
level 83
Jan 29, 2014
Similarly--Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? was not only meant to be answered, but he answered it in the very next line: Thou art more lovely.
+2
level 76
Apr 4, 2015
Never heard how high the moon, either. I was thinking of the Johnny Cash song, "How High is the Water, Momma?" How about, "Do these pants make me look fat?" "What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?"
+1
level 67
Aug 2, 2015
I've heard 'How high the moon'....... but I don't know where from?
+1
level 71
Aug 9, 2016
Try listening to Ella's version at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-cHYXaMCCIo, where she first sings it straight, then scats it, then scats Charlie Parker's "Ornithology," also based on the changes in the original song.
+1
level 52
Oct 26, 2013
Why is the rum always gone?
+1
level 37
Nov 22, 2013
Yes Jack, the rum is gone.
+1
level 50
Jul 22, 2014
Have you seen that video? Just google YouTube Why is the rum gone? And be prepared for hilarity. Also, 'I've got a jar of dirt.' Not quite as funny, but still funny.
+1
level 58
Aug 9, 2016
Oh...that's why.
+2
level 80
Oct 26, 2013
Who's your daddy?
+1
level 32
Oct 28, 2013
That was rhetorical until Jeremy Kyle started we found out a lot of people don't know the answer to that...
+2
level 20
Oct 27, 2013
You talkin' to me?
+2
level 83
Feb 11, 2014
I wish the clue about spots had the blank on the word spots, so I could demand an alternate based on the Discworld saying, "Can a leopard change its shorts?"
+2
level 72
May 13, 2014
Could not believe Brian Boitano was not accepted for what would ___ do.
+2
level 55
Jul 10, 2014
He'd make a plan and he'd follow through.
+1
level 72
Dec 8, 2014
What would Plato do? (from A Fish Called Wanda)
+2
level 77
Sep 13, 2017
I'm sure he'd kick an ass or two. That's what Brian Boitano'd do.
+1
level 79
Feb 16, 2018
I tried Mother, Elvis and Kalbahamut before giving up. I figured if none of those worked it probably wasn't worth knowing...
+2
level 65
Jun 18, 2018
What a fantastic movie.
+1
level 66
Mar 5, 2015
"Shall I compare thee to a summer's EVE?" is a better question. :P
+1
level 67
Aug 2, 2015
You should re-write Shakespeare's works... I'm sure you would make a fortune.
+1
level 58
Aug 9, 2016
Well, the answer to "day" was no, cause summer's days are hot and fickle and windy and not lovely or temperate (enough). So, if you're trying to get a yes out of the question, then you're probably on the right track. Ish.
+1
level 61
Aug 1, 2019
Haha I magine that "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day.." "NO!!" haha

"Ehm ok, wait here, I ll come up with something else" "Well... Don't take too long!!.."

Sorry I am enjoying myself here I can sooo picture this conversation hahah

+2
level 71
Jul 15, 2016
I'm sad "Does a bear ____ in the woods?" was missing.
+1
level 67
Aug 9, 2016
I think you mean, "Does the Pope ____ in the woods?"
+1
level 61
Aug 1, 2019
What does the pope do with the bear in the woods?
+1
level 62
Aug 9, 2016
"What do you want, a medal?"
+1
level 51
Oct 27, 2016
Or a chest to pin it on?
+3
level 79
Aug 9, 2016
Why so serious?
+1
level 27
Aug 17, 2016
*How do you like them apples
+1
level 70
Mar 7, 2017
I can actually clap with one hand.
+1
level 47
Mar 29, 2017
Apples? I've always heard "Onions". (SE Pennsylvania)
+2
level 71
Sep 12, 2017
Maybe allow Brian Boitano as a write-in for Jesus...
+1
level 49
Sep 12, 2017
"How High the Moon", Les Paul & Mary Ford
+1
level 60
Sep 12, 2017
I never heard the question how high the moon. I suppose at the time that was a rhetorical question but now we know how high (or more accurately, how far away) the moon is, 238,900 miles away.
+2
level 66
Jan 24, 2018
ame as the chicken and the egg. Very puzzling in the past but has a clear answer now (since Darwin). Amniotes that were the ancestors of birds started laying eggs over 300 million years ago. Bird-like ancestors showed up around 170 million years ago, then modern birds roughly 100 million years ago, then chickens about 45 million years ago.

So the egg came first. By over 250 million years...
+1
level 65
Jun 18, 2018
Simply stated, the answer is the egg. Dinosaurs laid eggs before there were chickens. Speaking of chickens, why did the chicken cross the road? To show the possum that it could be done.
+3
level 45
Sep 12, 2017
how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood
+1
level 65
Sep 12, 2017
Why do the things that happen to stupid people keep happening to me?
+1
level 58
Apr 3, 2018
"What's up?"
+1
level 61
Aug 1, 2019
Ugh yea, and how are you... noone wants to hear the answer.. you are forced to say great, it is the one and only accaptable answer.. ok.. good is accepted aswell..
+2
level 46
Jun 18, 2018
I got a 0 because I wasn’t supposed to answer any of these questions.
+2
level 67
Jun 18, 2018
Is the Space Pope reptilian?
+1
level 38
Oct 14, 2018
The correct saying is: "If a tree falls in the forest and there's no one there to hear it, does it make a sound"?
+2
level 46
Mar 4, 2019
Can Scooby be allowed as an alternative for Jesus?
+1
level 49
Mar 25, 2019
How exactly are these questions considered 'rhetorical?" Some of the questions are philosophical like "Does a falling tree make a sound if nobody is there to hear it."
+1
level 61
Aug 1, 2019
yea it is a quite random collection... entertaining nonetheless. (Only the bleed question feels truly rhetorical, the other are mostly more philosophical or just sarcastic).

On that note... the list is rather endless. how about "what are you... 5 ?!" frequently seen in comment sections.. And the countless variations on are you stupid or something. wth where you thinking. In traffic: are you blind?. As parents: am I talking to the wall? Or the vague, What where you thinking!

+1
level 65
Aug 5, 2019
I got terribly screwed up on the Joe DiMaggio question. I just couldn’t get CottonEye Joe out of my head (which also has a lot of rhetorical questions). Where did he come from? Where did he go? Where did he come from, CottonEye Joe?