Statistics for Are You Competent... or Incompetent?! Phrases Quiz

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Phrase	% Correct
You couldn't find your arse with both {hands}.	94%
You couldn't fight your way out of {paper} bag.	88%
US variant: You couldn't organise a two car {funeral}. (Only one car is a hearse).	81%
Dutch variant: You couldn't push a {frog} from a riverbank. (Think: amphibious creature).	75%
You don't know your arse from your {elbow}.	63%
Musical variant: You couldn't carry a {note or tune} in a bucket. (word has four letters)	50%
You couldn't organise a {piss} up in a brewery.	50%
You couldn't pour water out of a {boot} that had directions on the heel.	44%
Are you as much use as a {chocolate} teapot?	38%
NZ variant: You couldn't sell a {statue} to a pigeon. (They like to sit one one of these carved objects).	38%
You couldn't organise a {bun} fight in a bakery.	38%
You couldn't knock the {skin} off a rice pudding.	31%
Australian variant: You couldn't {raffle} a chook in a pub. (Chook=chicken as meat. Tickets and chance are involved)	25%
You couldn't run a {whelk} stall. (Illustrated above).	13%