Ranking Every Song by Billie Eilish

Here’s how this works: I take all 49 album tracks and other singles officially released by singer Billie Eilish, and rank them from worst to best. It’s that simple. Here’s a rundown of Eilish’s discography:

- don’t smile at me EP (2017)

- WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO? (2019)

- Happier Than Ever (2021)

Need I mention that this is my subjective opinion?

I get that she wanted to collaborate with her childhood idol, but this is flat-out bad. Bieber effectively ruins a great song that will appear much later in the list.

A 14-second intro to Eilish’s debut album where she takes out her invisalign. It’s a non-song and the fact that the Bad Guy remix is lower on the list is a testament to its poorness.

An early single where Billie hasn’t quite found her voice yet.

Forgettable melody and a meh vocal performance make this song one of Billie’s most bland. Not to mention its baffling placement as the closing track on Happier Than Ever.

This should be much better than it is. Recorded for the soundtrack of Euphoria, this collaboration just doesn’t do anything new or unique.

Not even the best Billie song recorded for the 13 Reasons Why soundtrack.

The weakest song on Don’t Smile At Me. If you want a Billie Eilish ukulele track, listen to “8” instead.

It’s… decent? I’ve gone back and forth on this song a few times. I don’t hate it but it was an underwhelming single choice.

The most interesting thing in this kiss-off to a bad boyfriend is a sample of the singer’s barking dogs.

A nice, quiet song written for an Apple ad. It’s also the closest thing in Eilish’s discography to a Christmas song.

This one starts off beautifully but near the end there’s an unnecessary switch in pace. I’ve noticed that Billie has started to overuse this mid-song switch-up tactic.

The better of the two ukulele-driven songs on this list, if somewhat out of place on WWAFA. The pitched-up vocals at the beginning are somewhat odd.

A beautifully pulsing, whispery spoken-word interlude about body shaming. But it’s not a song.

As a gay person I can’t say I find this very offensive. The song itself is far from bad and I love the banging production, but the lyrics are very clumsy.

This theme song for a still yet-to-be-released James Bond movie showcases Eilish’s vocal range beautifully but lacks personality.

The haunting outro track for WWAFA. It’s a great closer to a great album. I like it a lot more than I should.

A woozy, lo-fi-esque one-off single.

On paper, a guitar ballad about emotional abuse sounds really weird as a single, but Billie pulls it off well. The vocals sound too murky though.

Doesn’t hold up quite as well as many songs off Don’t Smile At Me, but it’s goofy, danceable, and quotable. Alright dude, go trip over a knife.

A low-key track with a great, glitchy beat. Very catchy chorus, I like it a lot.

&Burn is the better version but this is a great song. Great concept. Classic Billie.

A chilling ballad. Beautiful, especially in the context of the album.

Sets the tone of Happier Than Ever very well. It shows how much Billie has grown in maturity since her Don’t Smile At Me days.

The song that started it all. It’s not one of her best works but you have to give it credit for being the beginning of a great career.

As you can tell from the title, this single was inspired by the film “ROMA”. The autotune-heavy song itself is very different from normal Eilish fare but it works surprisingly well.

Gloriously rebellious, this jaunty, hell-themed track will be a future Halloween classic.

The original Bad Guy. An iconic introduction to the persona of Billie Eilish.

The aforementioned better version of Watch adds more polished, hip-hop production and a rap verse from Vince Staples.

A quiet, seductive track with a head-bobbing bossa-nova-inspired beat.

Beautiful strings and piano accompany Khalid and Billie Eilish on this lovely (haha get it?) song recorded for 13 Reasons Why.

A goofy, romping anthem, clapping back at Billie’s nay-sayers.

This song makes taking over the world sound fun. And I live for it.

A near-perfect ballad with social commentary. This is what Male Fantasy wishes it could be.

Positivity anthem with immaculate lo-fi production. I love it so much.

The funky production and cheeky The Office samples always make me smile.

Similar to My Strange Addiction, this groovy track from Happier Than Ever is one of Billie’s most raunchy.

The popping beat and creepy melody elevate this from a boring little ditty to a career highlight.

This should have been a hit. The thumping beat and the throbbing chorus? Just yes. The transition into Therefore I Am? Everything about this is great.

Billie at her saddest - and her best. The humming harmonies give me chills.

In this early cut, Billie inhabits the mind of a serial killers. It’s a masterclass in storytelling - not to mention that beat drop!

This beautiful ballad about love gone too far is the best song on Don’t Smile At me. The build-up is SO GOOD.

A tribute to her brother and producer, Finneas, this single released in between WWAFA and Happier Than Ever is one of her best. There’s something about the comforting lyrics, beautiful piano riff, it’s just transcendent.

Did anyone see this coming?

Before releasing a string of singles and eventually her sophomore album, Happier Than Ever; Eilish posted a snippet of the title track to her YouTube channel. The snippet was a hushed ukulele track.

Instead of that, we got a five-minute epic that turns into a pop-rock electric power ballad halfway through, showing everyone that Billie Eilish doesn’t just whisper.

This WWAFA cut serves as a PSA warning about the dangers of drug use. The special thing about this, though, is the production. It’s jazzy, which juxtaposes well with the drugged-up sounding vocal effects. It works amazingly.

Instantly recognizable, this was Billie’s first #1 hit, and deservedly so. Flipping gender roles, pioneering ASMR-pop, and being an all-around bop, all in one song? Duh.

What a song. Written from the perspective of the monster under your bed, this is the epitome of Eilish’s trademark creepiness. Whispery vocals, unnerving lyrics, and weirdo samples. Love it.

So yeah, that’s my not-very-methodical ranking. Do you agree with it? Maybe I’ll do more of them, I don’t know.

Thanks for reading,

WashingMachine